What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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what do you get if you put a baby in a microwave? an erection

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What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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Yo mamma is so fat She has to wear big pants and is easily fatigued.

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A terrorist. What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. What are you racist or something?

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-Can I ask you one question? -Yes. -Thank you.

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"Look me in the eye" said Cyclops.

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Knock, knock. Door opened.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Why did the boy yawn? Because he was tired.

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

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whats the difference between a door knob? a milk carton, because people have legs so they can walk !!!!!

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i went to the bar. soon after i entered the bar i got kicked out. why? becuase i'm seventeen.

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Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

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Beating cancer. Guess Steve Jobs they didn't make an app for that.

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guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

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whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

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So three hikers decide to face the deadly challenge of climbing Mount Everest. They were unaware of the risks, and were all brutally killed in an avalanche.

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whats worse than killing someone? finding out your mom is your dad

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roses are red violets are blue if u wanna fight call 111 ( we r in new zealand)

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What happens when a blond walks into a bar She buys a drink

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

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How do you teach an old dog a new trick? Answer: You can't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops