Why would you call a child douche bag? Cause they're sterile

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Q: Why did the black guy cross the road? A: Hell, I don't know. He probably stole something.

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Arrow in the Knee!

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whats worse, being kicked in the balls or giving birth? losing an arm to meningitis

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Somebody stole my goat, now I can't enter it in the fair

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knock knock - whos there whos there -"im confused" try it on someone

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So what have you overcome? I mean I know alot about you, but little about your personal deeper self, with that said, you telling me you are some kind of X-men when it comes to genetics?

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Knock knock Shut up

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what did the astronaut say to the rocket scientist? hi

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300 terrorists have a contest, they all jump off a tower and die. Who wins? Society.

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so a moose walks into a super market and asked the lady where can I find the potatoes the lady says isle five so the moose goes to isle five and there aint no potatoes.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

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The Princess is in another castle

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You are a special guy, and I mean that in a really sweet way, but a retard no. Synapses, tell me more please.

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What if the rest of you value something wrong?

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What's the difference between a piano and a goldfish? One's a piano, the other is a goldfish.

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Dave: Heyy Steve! Steve: Oh heyy Dave! Dave: The word of the day is legs! Steve: so? Dave: So lets go back to your place and spread the word? Steve: ....How about right now? ;) Both: HEY EVERYONE..WE'RE GUNNA HAVE SEX!

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family attempted to cross the road approximately 30 seconds earlier and were immediately struck by a moving vehicle traveling at 45 miles per hour. He crossed the road to try to comfort his family while they took their final breathes of life. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a man that had recently been laid off from his union job and came down with a disease that is considered uncurable by modern science.

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*Knock knock* Who's there? No one answers so the man opens the door and gets stabbed 7 times in the chest

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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What did the racist black man say to the white man? Nothing they both died in a car accident.

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The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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