Decode this; Hetay owcay aidsay oomay. Answer: ummmmm.... Let me think....ummm, does anybody speak pig latin?

hey, my names mark.

What worse than finding crap on the road? Tripping over and landing on it.

How did the 8 year old child die? He was raped at the age of 7 and given the STD of AIDS. His clock then started as his family weaped his final days of his life.

What is worse than finding dead parents? Not finding them.

whats the differences between an atari and a xbox 360 i don't know i'm not a video game nerd

Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 for violence and brief nudity.

I woke up in bed with someone this morning. ... Hah.

Roses are red.

Why did the man go to the hospital Because he was hurt

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on the training and hence productivity of the babies.

How long was the awkward silence it took to make Justin Bieber? Really long.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 3, according to Mr. Owl

I AM YOUR SALVATION! And you are my poopstain

Don't make my new Nazi friend upset, or he'll be Fuhrerious

What's liquid, clear, and tastes like water? H20

What do you get when you jump into the Red Sea? Wet.

How can you tell if a duck is quaking? Hear it

no pun intended

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

it's weird how Jesus came out of the cave on the same day as Easter

My girlfriend is getting an abortion tonight. Its a surprise.

Roses are red Violets are red Your flowers are red Yes set your garden on fire

How do you blindfold an Asian person? Take a price of cloth and put it over his eyes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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