a man walks into a bar some other people get up and greet him as they are his friends. he then has a great night with his friends. he goes home and goes to sleep. he wakes up with a man next to him

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A blonde is elected President of the United States. Half way through her inauguration speech, she forgets how to read.

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whats the best part of having sex with twenty-three year olds? there's twenty of them.

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God made rivers God made lakes God made you We all make misstakes

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What did the fat black man do? Get a gym membership.

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what do you call a baby rapest jordan gregg

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How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a rock at it

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Brother Bro-ther Broad her Soap

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who dosent like to wear shirts and is not straight Petko Manchev

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Your garden's on fire.

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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What did the rich white student to the poor arabian teacher? good morning Mr.Stevenson.

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-Knock knock. ~Use the doorbell. -Ding dong. ~The witch is dead!

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Why did the boy cry? Because his mother died of a heart attack.

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When faced with an impossible question. I like to give, and maybe receive, an impossible, yet endearing, request/answer to the problem. Sex?

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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What do you call a man that paints on a his face and wears big shoes? Lady Gaga.

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Two black guys and two asians get pulled over. The cop says i cant let you go unless all of your dicks add up to 15 inches. They added up to exactly 15 inches - The black guys both added up to 7 inches each and the asians added up to 1/2 inch each. When they were driving away both of the asians said thank god we had boners.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it's goal was to get to the other side however unfortunately a giant gorilla picked up a car; threw it at a nearby building causing it to collapse; setting off a massive explosion causing all of the buildings on that side of the street to collapse. As the whole other side of the street was covered in rubble making it impossible for the chicken to get to the other side, so the chicken decided to turn around and go home.

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An Italian, a Mexican, and an American all stand in one room. The Italian throws pasta out the window and says "We have too much of this in our country." The Mexican throws a taco out the window and says "We have too much of this in our country." The American throws a burger out the window and says "We have too much of this in our country."

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1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Did you hear the one about the HIV positive man that got rear-ended on the highway? The motorist behind him was distracted on his cell phone, and did not hit the breaks in time to stop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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