What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? one dead baby nailed to ten trees

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and grass is green due to the fact that there is chlorophyll in it.

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A blonde was drinking water from the water fountain. She was very thirsty.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

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Whats the difference between a Philadelphia Flyers fan and a pedophile? What they are.

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A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

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What's the difference between a bicycle? An orange because it has no sleeves.

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scenario: two teddy bears wrestling under water question: how many apples does it take to tussel with a potato answer: 96 becouse pillows dont eat chease

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I like touching my boobs

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Your mother is so fat; I love fat fat people.

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If Chuck Norris were to roundhouse you. Then something previously happened before the altercation, that caused tension.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple

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Whay is jerry so bad at parallel parking? He just got a sex change yesterday.

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whdid the cop say to the robber as he ran out of the bakery? I caught you bread handed

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What did the african get for his birthday? an ounce of water, as water is very scares in his community and it is a great resource

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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What's the difference between Mel Gibson and a pineapple? Well at a molecular level, not much because both are made up of atoms.

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Abbie im pretty sure your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have 5 fingers. The middle one is for you.

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What do you call a skeleton in your closet? Evidence of a brutal crime. You should probably call the cops.

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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