A Jehovah's Witness knocks on my door. I didn't answer the door.

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sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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what did the homeless man get for christmas.......................nothing

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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What is the anwer to life? (>^v^ )> KIRBY DANCE

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What's the best part of any family reunion? Sodomy.

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what do you get if you put a baby in a microwave? an erection

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what types of people have big noses? people whose parents both carried the recesive gene.

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What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

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Do you like fishsticks No

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What's the difference between a baby and an onion? One is a vegetable and the other is a human being.

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How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

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The Sentence Below Is True The Sentence Above Is False

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Johnny tried talking to his dog, there was no response.

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What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

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Why are all Asians smart? Not all of them are, Asians are stereotypically smart because their parents most likely grew up in an under-developed country and want their children to be successful because they don't want their children to experience what they did.

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Q: Why couldn't the ginger play soul music ? A: He couldn't hit the right notes

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How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

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Why didn't the girl's ring fit? She had no fingers.

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Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

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What do you call an Asian man without any clothes on? -naked

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Whats slippery and wet? A wet slipper.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

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What happens when you give someone a free chocolate bar? ThEeyroast it and vapourise it intheir hands....no they eat it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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