So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

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2 pilots rowed a boat across the desert. How long did it take to reach the moon? Answer: Purple because chickens don't use magic.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why was the girl sad? Because she was, you idiot!

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So a woman goes to the doctor for an ultra-sound. The doctor says I have good news. The woman inquisitively replies what is it doctor, the doctor replies ; Your baby is Dead.

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what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A hurt animal that should promtly be taken to the RSPCA for surgery.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the paralympics? Walking.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia So do I

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What do you call a dog riding a bicycle? An talented dog.

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Holocost jokes arent even that funny, Anne Frank-ly they annoy me.

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what did helen keller say to the nazi? -nothing, helen keller was blind and deaf so she could never aquired the ability to speak

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I went to Nebraska and saw a dead squirrel

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Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

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A black man from Harlem walked in to a store. He then proceeded to buy a few items using money he had earlier procured by working dilligently.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was struck by lightning and died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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Whats orange and sounds like a parrot? a carrot

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A woman buys a man a Valentine's Day present.

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Yo mama so ugly, she has to work harder than most women to attract men.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Yo mama so fat! Really she should get on an exercise program and watch her diet, as she is at higher risk for diabetes and other health issues

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, He gave me AIDS, And I gave them to you!

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Who let the dogs out? Their owner because he had come to the rational conclusion that they were cooped up in their cage all night and were in serious need of relieving themselves and needed love and affection

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops