roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

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Where did the farmer take his pigs on Saturday afternoon? the Slaughterhouse

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Why can't Tom Maynard play cricket anymore Because he's dead

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A priest and a police officer are sitting at a bar. They both have considerable drinking problems because problems unrelated to their respective occupations. The bartender's name is Mike.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Knock knock Who's there? NYPD you are being placed under arrest come out with your hands up.

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what did lois call peter when she first saw him? i dont dont know do you?

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Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

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reggin... its N I GG E R backwards

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knock knock whose there? banana? banana who? im sorry but you have to go to the doctor now.......

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasnt due to the fact that numbers have no feeling.

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How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

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A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his crotch... The bartender calls the police as the man is arrested as piracy an act of robbery or criminal violence.

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What did the little boy with cancer ask for from the Make a Wish foundation. A cure and to lose his virginity before he dies.

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Why couldn't the man open his car door for the women? He drove a jeep with removable doors

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What do you call a black mailman? By his name.

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How do you teach another person's son to ride a bike? You don't. Let his real parents teach him to ride a bike.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i have Alzheimers, Roses are red

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What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

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1 out of every 3 relationships someone is cheating, I wonder if it was my wife or my girlfriend

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What's old and baggy? An old bag.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it has a serious crack addiction and there was a drug dealer on the other side.

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Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

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knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops