what has hair and can fly? a human.. i lied about the flying.

Your mom is so poor She will soon have to make the difficult decision whether or not to put you up for adoption

Whats wrong Nero? What happened? Please pick up the phone, I am trying to call you, but it just goes from dialing to changing tunes, please do not be upset with me, what did I do wrong? I thought we had an understanding, please just pick up the phone, if you already have my number and all you got nothing to lose...

Why was the little boy crying? Because he had an undescended testicle

"It smells like Up dog in here." "How do you know what the dog from the movie "Up" smells like? It's computer-animated and not real." "I...I think I have a brain tumor..."

Everyone is different, but there are two of me, therefore I am unique. I have 72 different personalities, which all think, act and behave the same, all have my same name, but its still different to have such a thing eh? No I am not asking, I just added that weird little lightbulb symbol after "eh". People buy my book, its full of this nonsense... Its named "Are you left winged, or wrong winged" The book that has nothing to do with politics, and everything to do with politicians non existent sexlife! (seriously I had a book signing today... It was weird, people like stood in line twenty Signatures... AND PEOPLE ARE ALL GOING "HEY ARE YOU THAT GUY FROM HORSEHEAD?" Nero -WHO THE FUCK! IS THAT GUY ON HORSEHEAD?

What do you call two black men and a hispanic man in the back of a car? The punchline of this joke is offensive, and might bring legal troubles to Anti-Joke.Com and it's subsidiaries. For these reasons, Anti-Joke.Com will not allow it to be shown.

Why is Kim Jong Un so horrible? I forgot the rest of the joke but your mum is a whore

Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

What did Tom get for his 5th Birthday ? Nothing, he died when he was 2 years old

A psychotic man walks into a pharmacy He buys his weekly medication to control his condition.

Three black men walk into a gas station and don't steal anything.

What does a dyslexic person do on sundays? Goes to church to pray to Dog

Whats more realistic than evolution? Everything

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

whats black and white and red all over? this joke.

Why did the american block the road? Because he just ate at Mc donalds.

Yo momma is so fat that she is overweight

whats funner than nailing a baby to a wall, ripping it off

Want to hear a dirty joke? Well... I can't tell you. It's inapropriate.

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother.

Roses are red Violets are blue Urine is yellowish and shit is usually brown... That's it, I was just remembering the colors of some stuffs

Hey wanna hear joke? ........ yeah .......me too

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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