How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because it would be hazardous to other motorists well-being.

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Why dd the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She lost her arms to cancer.

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A horse didn't walk into a bar. The door wasn't big enough

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what happened to the man who got stuck in a car after a crash? the ambulance failed to arrive and he died a slow, trajic death.

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a gay man walks into a bar the bartender says "what'll it be today" he asks for a beer the bartender comes back with a beer because thats what he asked for.

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What do you put in a toaster? Toast, oh wait, it's bread

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why'd the Chinese kid die how the hell should i now

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im 14, over weight and spotty! you interested? .... im desperate:)

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What is is one good thing about global Waming? Nothing.

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What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

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What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

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Did you hear the one about the spoon and the dis running away while the cow jumped over the moon, IMPOSSIBLE! eating material such as the spoon and dish are inanimate objects, and cows cant jump for they weigh from 600 to 1000 lbs.

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Why didn't Johnny walk to school this week? He was dead.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" Of course not.

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7 chickens ran down the road. One ate a spider. He is now the fattest chicken.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb that explodes in 3 seconds inside your apple.

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What's worse then Justin Bieber? 9-11

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Microwave

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Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

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Text this number just cuz 16305208722

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A man walks into a bar, but it was a gay bar, and the man was a homosexual so he stayed and had fun then later that night he went home to his girlfriend

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penis haha

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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