A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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two people are falling out of a plane, a blond and a brunnete who hit the ground first. the blond, the brunnete brought a parachute

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tell ur mom i love her before i die this would have been a better ending to the tintanic

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Why did the chicken kross the road? It didn't because it was a highway and it got hit by a bus.

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Im batman...suck it losers

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michael: How old do I look? stranger: about 68? How old are you? michael: I cant remember I have alzheimers. michael: How old do I look?

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jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

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What's for dinner tonight? Your mom's vagina.

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How do you get a clown to stop laughing? Throw an axe at it's face.

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what do you call a black man on a killing spree? whatever his xbox live gamertag is. that would probably be most appropriate

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Is there anything better than pussy? Ya a really nice book

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Why didnt the 14 year old get her period? Because she had gotten pregnant by her father

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He goes to the restroom and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. He goes to the restroom again and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. Guess what happens next? A. He goes to the restroom to urinate B. He buys another drink C. He flirts with a very attractive lady D. Goes home and masturbates

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Why did i write this joke knowing i wont get published? I don't know.

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what is the difference between a black person and a little boy with autism .... the boy with autism is smarter with more education than the black person

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Your mamma's so fat she has been called morbitally obese

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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Q:Whats worst then finding a worm in your apple? A:Getting raped in the ass.

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why did the man take the bus to work he didnt have a liscence

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? This joke.

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do you wanna hear a joke school

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? rape

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Q: What's full of different butts and smells bad? A: An ashtray.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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