Why did a little kid have a long face Because his face was stretched out by a truck wheel

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Your momma's so fat she has diabetes and my have to get one of her legs amputated. It's actually quite sad.

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Here is a nursery rhyme: Jane is a scruff, she has a head full of nits. She also had pain in her great big... Now don't get excited. Don't be mislead. Because all that Jane had was a pain in her head!

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there's a few black guys in a car, who's driving? their dad because they're kids

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What did the customer say to the waitier? "I think I'll have the special."

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what is the difference between a blond and a red head? one is has blond hair and one has red hair

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What follows 2 days of rain? Statistically more rain, but you'll have to check the weather report to be sure.

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you were so loud you woke helen keller up!!!!!!!

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How many napkins does it take to tack to the moon? Purple, snakes don't have elbows

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What is small, green, lives 10 meters under the ground and eat rocks? The little green rock eater!

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baloney sandwich

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have a gun, So get in the van

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Why did the helicopter crash? Because the driver was fat.

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why was the clown sad? because his wife left him

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A farmer has 17 sheep standing in a field and all but 9 drop down and die. How many sheep are left? It doesn't matter. A CIA sniper guns the farmer down, along with his family and the remaining sheep. The other agents move in and remove all evidence that the government is experimenting with a new nerve agent.

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Whats the difference between pizza and a Jewish person? Pizza doesnt scream when being put into an oven.

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Wanna hear a joke? that disabled guy who wants to climb mount everest.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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a dedicated fat guy joins a kung fu dojo he is asked to dedicate his like to his kung fu the fat man dose not he is already dedicated to being a fat guy

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roses are red violets are blue no seriously they are

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What's worst than your computer breaking? Your face

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Women's Rights.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems rhyme This doesn't.

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What can fly, but can not swim? Malaysia Airlines Flight 370

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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