Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? extremely unfortunate...

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what did the dog say to the cat? give me back my dog food.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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Why doesnt mexico have an olympic team? Because everyone who can run, jump, or swim in already in america.

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Knock Knock. Who`s there? The police, your family were killed in a bakery A German bakery.

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What's worse than getting AIDS? shaking hands with a liberian doctor. Knock Knock Who's there? Ebola

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Why did little Susie fall off the cliff? I pushed her.

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Why couldn't the man lick his elbows? Because it is scientifically proven that over 98% of humans can not lick their elbows.

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a man walks into a bar some other people get up and greet him as they are his friends. he then has a great night with his friends. he goes home and goes to sleep. he wakes up with a man next to him

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What's worse than the Holocaust? • • • Stubbing your toe.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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What's more fun then spinning a dead baby around on a clothesline at 50 miles an hour? Stopping it with a shovel.

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What do you call a computer running Windows DOS? Obselete

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The once was a man from Nantucket, Who gave up on his life and said "damn this!" Then he won lots of money, His future looked bright and sunshiny Until one day he suddenly died

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How many Mexicans does it take to cross the border? Don't answer, just think and laugh.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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I do not want to know, you want to TELL ME so that I can increase the potency of the hypnotic suggestion by... Lets say... A number that if I said would work instantly? I wrote CONDOMS ARE FOR PUZZIES... Which kinda makes sense... Just a line, from the worst game ever.

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Why did the black guy wear a hat? To keep the sun out of his eyes

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Whats worse than ten babies stapled to a tree? One baby stapled to ten trees.

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how do you turn your dishwasher into a garbage disposal? make her take out the trash.

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Sometimes I sit in the bath and pretend im a bubble

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Why did Jack take a prune out for the evening? A healthy snack as part of a balanced diet.

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i walk into a bar,and then proceed to be taken out because i am a minor -chuckles

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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