So there's this moose right? And he walks into the store and asks where the potatoes are. And the cashier lady says aisle 5. So the moose walks to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't go to you anyways.

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Why did the man jump out of the plane? Because the plane was losing fuel fast so he grabbed a parachute and went for it and realized that was the only one left so everyone died a horrible death.

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Q: How do you make a baby cry? A: Throw a brick at it.

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How did the dog die? He was put down.

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Q. What's The Best Thing About Having Sex With Twenty Three Year Old's? A. There are 20 of them...

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If John had eight apples and he eats three. Calculate the mass of the sun.

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How do the Kardashians change a light bulb? They buy a new mansion

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When geese fly south, why is one side of the V usually longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not sally

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A man walks into a bar. He has a beer and then goes home.

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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Why did captain hook die? He wiped asss

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A woman walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, my water just broke." The doctor replies "Get off my carpet."

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This is sparta No this is patrick

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What's the difference between difference and between? One is difference the other is between.

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Knock knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? T get to the other side of the road

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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A man walks in to a bar, what does he say? Ouch.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a black man? It would be cannibalism to eat a black man.

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Roses are red,I love the walking dead,but if they kill off Darrell ill watch glee instead

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You know how hitler wasn't accepted into the art school ? The teacher who didn't let him join was Jewish .

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If life gives you AIDs, make lemonaids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops