How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how you throw 'em.

a woman gives birth at the hospital in china and then the doctor comes in and says doctor- i have good news and bad news for your baby mother-what is it doctor- bad or good mother-bad doctor-the bad news is that the baby is a girl and the good news is that your baby has cancer

What do you get when you cross a Pigeon with a Mailbox? A Carrier Pigeon, they are extinct now.

What would you do if the house you're sitting in now exploded? Nothing really, you would have died a horrible death.

Why did the man with no arms or legs fall out of the tree? Because he got shot.

Why wasn't Steve paying attention in class? Because he was dead.

why couldnt the guy move his legs cuz he was paralyzed

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

Son: Mommy, Mommy can i have a cookie! Mom:Sure Honey there on the top shelf Son:But mommy i have no arms Mom:No arms, No cookies

Whats the similarity between a rabbit and a grape? There both purple, except for the rabbit.

bologna

Hi. P.S: You have aids. P.P.S: Purple penis pumpernickel pie puppets.

how many high school boys does it take to change a light bulb?? idk the light bulb in my bathroom is out and i need to know how many boys to call over to fix it.

If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Worth more points.

What do you call two mexicans playing basketball? A good example of friendly competition.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

A kid walks into a ctholic school and asks about the therory of evolution.

How do you rescue a fat girl that's stuck under a car? With a pickaxe and a donkey.

Starting a Genocide #YOLO

What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

Your mom is so stupoid she put a piece of paper on the TV and called it paper view!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i have Alzheimers, Roses are red

Whats the difference between a black guy and a bucket of shit? A black man is a life form, more specifically a homosapian, while the bucket, as well as the shit, is an inanimate object.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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