A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender can you throw me a beer and the bartender says yes and he throws him the beer and the man says I can't catch I have the smallest hands in the world and the bartender says go across the street there is a guineas book of world record store an check if you h e the smallest hands and he does so the next day he goes back and asks for another beer and the bartender throws him a beer and say I cant catch cause I have the smallest feet in the world and he goes across the street and checks and he does and then the third day he goes back to the bar and asks for a beer and the bartendor throws him another beer and says I can't catch I have the smallest penis in the world so he goes to the guiness book o world record store and then goes bac to the bar and asks..... Who's austin bell?????

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Why was the boy sad? Because his family was raped and stripped of their possessions

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To get to the other Saiid.

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Do you know what the zombie said? Raaargh Brains

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An American almost walks into a store when he sees a Jew. The Jew was also about to walk into the store, So the american opens the door for him and says"Jew first."

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What do u call a dumb Asian. An american

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A man walks into a bar,gets a drink, and then leaves.

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THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

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What did the athiest get for christmas? Well he shouldn't get anything becuase he doesn't belive in jesus.

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A man is riding down the road on his horse, Sally. He happens to see a horse without a rider, but with two saddles. He finds this peculiar, continues into town, and has a fine day.

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Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

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What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

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Your mom's so fat, she's is bigger than the average person.

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Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

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pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

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Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Having a Hippo give you head.

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Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

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Hello.

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Caitlin Jenner has a mangina.

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Yo momma's so fat that all the children within a close proximity of your home think that your mother is a very large woman.

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How do you choke a lawyer? You squeeze his neck until he stops breathing.

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Why did the man with no arms or legs fall out of the tree? Because he got shot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops