Why was the man whistling? He was calling his friend.

A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

Q: why is halloween scary? A: because your there!!!

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

If an old person falls in the middle of the woods do they make a sound? No their died.

jingle bells jingle bells,, bells were jingled!

In soviet russia...the abundance of natural oils and rich agricultural land provide it with a thriving economy

why wasnt nathan invited the party? nathan's been dead for 5 years

Why did Santa go to a rap concert? Because Santa was a rapper

What did the Crippled Orphan get for Christmas Cancer

Why did the boy jump off a bridge? Because he saw it on tv

What's green and would kill you if it fell on you? A golf course

What is a vampire's favorite desert? Assuming they are real I dont think they would enjoy it in the daylight, so really there's no point.

Pick up Lines skeet skeet skeet! JLR

Why was Timmy sad? He had 15 large cuban men slapping him for 27 hours straight.

Paul walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: no

Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

who is awesome? no one...

*Knock, Knock* Who's there? George. George who? George Ronald.

What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder? An anachronistic hypothetical sporting event that would never happen.

I'm a poet and I didn't even realize I was one

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and smashed his head on a jagged rock and screamed in anguish. Jill watched in horror as her brother suffered through the agonizing pain. Jack was rushed to the hospital immediately, but despite the doctors' efforts, he died. Jill mourned the loss of her brother for many years after the incident.

what is the difference between batman and a black guy. bat man is white

jack and jill went up a hill so jack could lick jills candy but jack got a shock and a mouth full of C O C K cause jill's real name was randy... ... and joe diragi liked it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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