A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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What ever happened to the bartender that asked, "Why the long face?" He was punched hard on the face for asking a stupid cliche!

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Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

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what do you call a black person who hated fried chicken? a vegetarian.

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well use a tissue!

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What did the White lady say to the Black lady? Hello, how are you?

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What did the black man do when his Polish friend died of cancer? He fertilized his front lawn as it was beginning to burn due to overexposure of the sun.

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what is the best part about sleeping with twenty six year olds? they are usually very experienced in sexual intercourse so there isn't much awkwardness

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Why was the phone wearing glasses? It lost its contacts!

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Two children are opening presents for Christmas. Daughter: "Look how many beautiful things I've got, look how much parents love me! And you got a Jo-Jo! Ha-ha!" Son*playing with Jo-Jo*: "Yeah, some of us have Jo-Jo, and some of us leuchemia. Ha-ha."

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What did the fly say when he went to Dunkin Donuts? Can I have a doughnut?

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What do you call a man in Afghanistan? Either a scuicide bomber a soldier or a tep

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Dad: i hate you. dads son:(kills him self)

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WOw you have no life

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can you touch your toes? no

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights.

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What's worse than having a FUPA? The Holocaust

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What did the rabbi say at the party? Mazel Tov.

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Have you heard that joke about Helen Keller? No. Neither has she.

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Where does Charlie Sheen buy his clothes? Winners

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Did you know diarrhoea is genetic? It is a side effect of Polycystic Kidney Disease.

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Why are black people so ghetto? because they live in the ghetto

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Yo momma's so fat that she's gotta get a special door that will allow her to get through.

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I don't find blind jokes funny. Honestly, I just can't see the humor in them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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