How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? Purple because, ice-cream has no bones.

Q; what did the gangster say after he and his gang robbed a bank? A;Hey boys lets go drink some soy milk (After that his gang killed him) but the moral of the story is to not rob banks or take drugs

Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: 2 in the front, 3 in the back and 95 in the ash tray.

How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

why was the little boy sad? he found out that George Washington was dead.

A blind man walks into a bar and a table and a lady....

What do you call a dog with no legs? What ever you want, its still not going to come.

What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

Why was the boy sad he ate a loaf of bread? Because ducks ate him alive after that.

Why couldn't the dinosaur sing? Because dinosaurs are extinct

Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

Q: What is Tarzan's favorite Christmas Carol? A: None. He was raised by gorillas, who are unlikely to have ever heard of Christmas.

Q: If it takes a chicken a day and a half to lay an egg and a half, then how long would it take a monkey to kick the seeds off of a dill pickle. A: I don't know. That's a stupid question.

What african eat for christmas Sand.

What do you do when a sing is stuck inside your head? Put a gun to your head, and shoot the song to death. It will work. Trust me. Youll never hear the song again. Or anything again.

What do you call an elephant and a rhino mixed? Ahellifiknow.

What is the difference between John and John Nothing

How did the 8 year old child die? He was raped at the age of 7 and given the STD of AIDS. His clock then started as his family weaped his final days of his life.

I remember the last words my Grandfather said before he kicked the bucket: "Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know ask a second grader.

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

"Where's your mom?' "She died last night. . ."

What did the deaf person see? He was blind too, so he didn't see anything.

Yo mama is so nasty she won't take a shower till she is dead you idiot says the boy she won't die she has twenty thousand live

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...