How many blind men does it take to change a light bulb? None. They are blind and do not care if it is light or dark in their surroundings.

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What do you call an Islamic man fling a plane? A very frightened passenger who took over flying the plane when the pilot collapsed due to a heart attack

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Q.what has big ears? A.your vagina.

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my mind's eye?

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what is the difference between a black person and a little boy with autism .... the boy with autism is smarter with more education than the black person

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Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? It didn't. She did not own a dog.

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Q: What did Jenna Jameson say when she heard hard banging near the front door? A: Come inside

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I donated to Kony 2012. Litterally to Kony. I approve of his actions.

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Where do baby apes sleep? In apricots

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What's clear, glass-like, and makes your brain feel like it's exploding just by smelling it? Crystal Meth

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How can you tell if a joke is skept? Tell it to raysean and see if he laughs

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What's green, grows in my basement, and if fun to smoke? Mold. I lied about it being fun to smoke.

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You know what the Germans have to say about problems? For every problem there is a final solution.

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating in mid air? Drop It Niggher!

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Q: What happened when lost John lost his crack cocaine? A: He bought some weed.

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Wanna hear a joke? women's rights. jaye clenton is a fag.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Flesh is green When the dead start to rise you're on my team

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Whats worse than a suicide bomber? Hubcaps

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Why can't helen keller drive a car? Because she is a woman

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How do you get 100 Jews into a car? You can't. It's physically impossible.

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A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father shits on his desk.

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Q~ What did the black man say to the priate when he pulled out a AK47? A~ "This is a gun. im going to kill you with it."

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Q. What's a pirate's favorite type of movie? A. It depends on the individual pirate, although most modern-day pirates are from third world countries like Somalia and so are too poor to be able to watch many movies. Classical pirates like those depicted in Treasure Island or Pirates of the Carribean are, of course, from a period of history before movies had been invented, so couldn't possibly have had a favorite.

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When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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