What do you call two mexicans playing basketball? Friends

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You know you're drunk when you've spend a significant amount of time consuming alcohol.

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Why does the chicken cross the road? 4

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? Nothing, it didn't get stuck in the first place because cows are incapable of climbing trees.

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What do Lincoln, JFK, and Barack Obama all have in common? They were all president of the United States of America and are relatively good people.

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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There's a mexican and african american in a car. Who's driving? A cop.

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children of those parents which are childless, are often childless too...

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whats worse than speaking with your mouth full? pooing with your mouth full

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Which square is small and yellow? The small, yellow square.

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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I scream, you scream, we all scream because we're getting murdered.

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why did the man buy kool aid? because it was on sale and he was thirsty

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Why did the car cross the road? Isn't that what cars do?

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I woke up today

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Roses are blue Violets are red I'm colour blind Which is sometimes quite annoying

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What's the opposite of white? Black. You're racist. You fapped.

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why was the man scared of the tree because it was shady

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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What do you call 4 Mexicans getting into a car late at night? 3rd Shift carpooling

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid being killed in the slaughter house.

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What do you call a pool filled with black people? A pool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops