What did the boy say 9+9 was? The Holocaust

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That`s my friends phone, I can call you from mine too if you want, please just don't hurt me, let me speak to you, I promise I will explain everything.

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a duck walks up to a lemonade stand, says to the man running the stand. quack, because he's a duck

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Why did the boy drown? Because he was actually a brick. I lied about him being a boy.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in cirlcles? nail its hand to the floor

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Its a bird!! Its a plane!! No, its a bird.

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Why did the sky turn gray? Yes because she thought it meant a quarterback.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead."

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was locked safely in the chicken coop.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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What's red and bad for you teeth. A brick

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What do you call an Amerindian who finished medical school? A doctor.

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Mommy mommy I don't want to see grandma. Shut up and keep digging.

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A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

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i told my parents that i was having friends come over my dad said great my mom said great so i said great

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What did the Frenchman say to the Englishman? I don't know, I don't speak French.

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your family have been involved in a fatal accident and we need you to come and identify the bodies.

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Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

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whats the difference between and clorox wipe and a paper towel? a clorox wipe is wet.

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What happens to a black man when he jumps into a pool of clorox? He turns white!

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How many ecotards does it take to change a light globe? Ve Vill Change all ze light globes to use;less grey vuns and you vill luv it or else ve vill kill you to save ze planet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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