If Selfish Sam has twelve cookies and Tricky Todd asks for three then how many cookies does sam have left? Twelve. Remember he's selfish

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Why do the lesbians where pants? Because they are extremely comfourtable and the best for cold days

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Roses are red My bulb is blue My pants are extending When I look at you

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Why was the black man tired? It was 3 AM, and he just came back from his demanding job as a surgeon.

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Whats worse then a rainy day? Rape.

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What did the mentally challenged kid get on his test? Drool

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You read this in school as a crowd of kids stand behind you laughing at your screen

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cher. Cher who? Just Cher.

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only A n a l because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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A Jewish man walks by a penny.

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Roses are red.........I slept with someone else

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I hate Jews The Holocaust

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Why was the little boy sad? -Because he was on Fire.

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"knock knock" "who's there" "I dont know, check the door"

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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What would happen if you insulted Chuck Norris' mother? Considering you did it on a messageboard that only unemployed people with no social lives use, nothing.

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*prepares this to get negative votes*

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"what's fat,stupid,and has a shell" "i don't know what" "you, i lied about the shell"

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Knock knock

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Why did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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why didthe man's computer crash? the man has a serious porn addiction

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Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

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What's the easiest way to load dead babies into a tractor trailer? Pitchfork.

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Q: What do you call it when you get shot in the face 20 times with a shotgun? A:Nothing, you're dead. Q:What do we call it when you get shot 20 times with a shotgun? A: A blessing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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