I guys look at this new game I bought, what is it, it's called penis it's supposed to be toatally hard

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

What do a black man and an elephant have in common? They are both multi-cellular organisms, they both belong to the kingdom Animalia, the phylum Chordata, and the class Mammalia, they both possess vertebrae, they both move through legged locomotion, they both possess knee joints and they both possess the capacity for altruistic behavior.

My name is Matt and I am homosexual. Just kidding. My names Rick.

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? 0. There are no lights at Auschwitz.

Six hats walk out of a garden. When mustard offal fruit paps.

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

Whats worse than a dog biting you? Cancer.

Stop Spam Read Books

What do you call an Asian man in a car? A motorist.

What did the homeless man say to his friends? He doesn't have any friends.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman

What did Santa say when he fell down? Ouch

A rabbit crosses a road... To be continued

Your mother is so fat that when she sits around the house, she feels bad about herself but is too embarrassed to get a gym membership and work-out in public.

A midget walked under a bar.

What do you get when you cross a black man and a mule. Arrested.

What is white and can't climb trees? Powdered sugar.

Knock knock! Who's there? Bob Hi bob, come inside. And next time just use the doorbell

Are you from Tennessee? Because you look like a product of incest

Why does Michael Jackson like twenty eight year olds? Michael Jackson is dead.

why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

What did the man say to the cat. ~It doesn't matter it impossible for 2 Species to Communicate between one another.

Why isn't this joke funny? Because it has no point.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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