A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is notified, and the duck is released into a nearby park.

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Yeah I was beginning to enjoy that as well, but I used "timed hypnosis" I have not seen it been coined elsewhere yet, not that I learn hypnosis anymore, I kinda teach it covertly to whoever I believe can use it responsively. "Timed hypnosis" is not really based upon a set amount of time after all time is relative, and our subconcious does know that and the subconcius understands that we did not invent time just because we made some fucking dials spin around" Now, timed hypnosis is based on a purpose, for example: "I will go into a trance until I am done teaching my new buddy how covert hypnosis works and teach her to use it subconciously" But now I made you aware of that, so you can use it consciously as well, the real magic here is that the subconcious is so much more efficient and powerful than the conscious mind that it would not even be neccesary to have a concious mind, except for one thing.

A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm a talking horse and that's what you ask me? On the day I just buried my only son?"

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How many finger does a normal person have? 8...and 2 thumbs!!

How many people does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

Billy was so silly that he named his pet zebra Spot.

-What did the policeman say to the boy? -Hello.

What's the answer to all your problems The answer

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a Jewish girl that lay on the other side.

010010101210001010 You dirty girl

Q: Were did suzy go after the explosion? A: Everywere

A guy walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because he is only 19 years old.

Whats Funnier than the Holacaust? A: Nothing you asshole!

this is stupid .... yep

My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

What's funnier than 24? NOTHING!!!

why did the guy throw his clock out the window? because he wanted to see a clock fall out the window

Your Mother

What did the alien say to the parachute? We're connected

Whats brown and smells bad poo

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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