What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

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What's white and black? Color blind.

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what do you say to a woman on her rags? nothing.try and ignore it.you didn't hear this from me and we never talked.

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Last night I had the strangest dream. I was eating a big marshmallow and when I woke up this morning I had appendicitus

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guess what my weiner dog did last night? pooped in my bed

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why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

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roses are red violets are blue i am black and so r u

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There is a terrorist attack. Muslims are blamed for it.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passenger seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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i hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaatttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy lllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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What does it mean if your born on opposite day? you have sids

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Why did the Mexican stop mowing the family's lawn? Because he felt it was time for his son to learn some responsibility.

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what's blue , and you can urinate on it ? a rim block.

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what is the tastiest veggie? veggies aren't tasty.

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the bat mobile? A: Robin get in the bat mobile.

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Give one reason for not visiting a hotel. Basil Fawlty is the manager.

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Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

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you: have you seen the movie constapated them:no you:its because it hasen't come out yet

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 Because 7 murdered her little sister

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck would chuck wood? I don't know. The woodchuck won't chuck wood.

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What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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