What's worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? Recognizing the baby as your missing child, and finding the corpse of your dead wife next to it.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust No, the Holocaust never even happened, you're an idiot.

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what did johnny's mom do for his 50th birthday? she died

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A. THERE'S SOMETHING ON YOUR FACE B. WHAT?!? *PUNCH* A. IT WAS PAINNNNNNNNN

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because lately the posts on "anti-joke.com" have not been anti-jokes. Not even a little.

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Why did the baby stop crying? It had been smothered to death by it's sleep- deprived single mother.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? I'm sleeping with your wife

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Three guys walk into a bar.....The fourth one ducks...

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knock! knock! Whos there? Chris Hansen..

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Why do all gingers get mad all the time except having sex? Because they enjoy it!!!

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Why did the carrot jumped over the fence? It didn't. Carrots do not have the physical ability to jump.

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What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder? An anachronistic hypothetical sporting event that would never happen.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet his friend the horse at a bar

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and smashed his head on a jagged rock and screamed in anguish. Jill watched in horror as her brother suffered through the agonizing pain. Jack was rushed to the hospital immediately, but despite the doctors' efforts, he died. Jill mourned the loss of her brother for many years after the incident.

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what's mouthwatering and smells like fish? salmon

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*Knock, Knock* Who's there? George. George who? George Ronald.

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what is the difference between batman and a black guy. bat man is white

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am a dog.

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What did the little boy with cancer ask for from the Make a Wish foundation. A cure and to lose his virginity before he dies.

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What do you call a kid with one arm and an eye-patch? Names.

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A priest, a paedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. And that's just the first guy

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Roses are Gray. Violets are Gray. I am a Dog.

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Why couldn't the black guy enter the room? He was too large to fit through the doorway therefore he turned around and left

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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