Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

Two fish walked into a bar. They died. Because fish can't breathe out of water.

Q: What were little Jonathon's grandmas last words before dying of Alzheimer's? A: Who are you?

What did the tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

What did the girl call the boy? ugly. they hated eachother.

My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

What is Hitler's favourite Yu-Gi-Oh card? Blue Eyes, White Dragon.

How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? One.

--- ___________________--- Can you tell what it is? Yes... Then what is it? Its a blanket,duh! ......

Why did the man die? He was old.

-Can I ask you one question? -Yes. -Thank you.

Q. Why was six afraid of seven? A. Because seven raped a three year-old child.

Stealth baseballs record

Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

I think poop is tasty... just kidding.

KENNAH CAMPIONS LAUGH

What do you call most people over 50 who aren't married. Divorced

Why did the girl go to the hospital? She had an asthma attack.

a horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "why the long face?". the horse answers..."i'm a horse"

Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

You're American when you enter the the bathroom and you're American when you exit the bathroom. What are you while you're inside the bathroom? Using the bathroom.

Whats sad about 4 blacks riding of a cliff in a cadilac. It was a rental.

What do you call Batman and Robin after they are run over by a steam roller? Dead

I went to Nebraska and saw a dead squirrel

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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