What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor? Monks do not speak.

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what do you get if you put a baby in a microwave? an erection

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Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

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A young cow died of terminal cancer; he said moo before he died

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why did the asian man get straight A's? because he worked hard and studied everyday

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A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have 5 fingers. The middle one is for you.

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A jewish man runs into a wall with an erection. He broke his nose.

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Q: How many children did it take to screw in a light bulb? A: The light bulb was already screwed in and exploded after excessive tampering

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Why do people poke people on facebook? Because they have no friends and will die alone

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Whats fun about having sex with twenty six year olds? Theres twenty of them

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I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

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sex with dead people. they can't say no;)

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Why was the little boy sad? Because his dog died

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What did the plane say to the other plane? Boy, those towers fall!

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what's worse than the holocaust? black people whats worse than black people? mexicans Whats worse than mexicans? 2 mexicans Whats worse than 2 mexicans? Africa

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Snow White found a magic lamp in the middle of the forest. She rubbed it and became pregnant because the spout was a penis.

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A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

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So I was walking down the road today

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What did the brick say to the wall? Nothing, as they are both inanimate objects that lack knowledge and the sense to speak.

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What's red and can't speak ? A strawberry

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Why was the pig sweating? It wasnt, because pigs have adapted by using behavioral thermoregulation, which is the act of cooling themselves in the mud or water.

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Your mother is so ugly it affects her self esteem.

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Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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