This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

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Knock Knock Who's there A girl scout want to buy some cookies to raise money for my cardiac surgery?

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Q: What did the train say when it sneezed twice? A: Trains are inanimate objects, thus they cannot sneeze or talk. Are you an idiot?

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Why did Joe wake up screaming? Because his wife cut off his penis.

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whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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What did the girl call the boy? ugly. they hated eachother.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Why did Jimmy fall of a building without a paracute? Because he lost a bet.

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Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

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What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor? Monks do not speak.

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what do you get if you put a baby in a microwave? an erection

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Q. want to hear a really funny joke? A. Fred Figglie-horn

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have 5 fingers. The middle one is for you.

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A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

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A jewish man runs into a wall with an erection. He broke his nose.

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why did the asian man get straight A's? because he worked hard and studied everyday

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A young cow died of terminal cancer; he said moo before he died

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Why do people poke people on facebook? Because they have no friends and will die alone

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sex with dead people. they can't say no;)

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Why was the little boy sad? Because his dog died

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what's worse than the holocaust? black people whats worse than black people? mexicans Whats worse than mexicans? 2 mexicans Whats worse than 2 mexicans? Africa

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Whats fun about having sex with twenty six year olds? Theres twenty of them

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I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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