whats worse then having sex with a blonde? having sex with a cactus

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So a blonde walks into a wall...

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Q: What do a dollar bill and a kite have in common A: I dont know

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Did you hear about the man who swam to the bottom of the ocean? He drowned

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Cole and his brother josh tag team jaycie until she cries herself to sleep while Sarah watches

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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why did corey cross the road? the green man flashed.

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Whats the difference between chris and a party. the locations

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How many Babies can be drowned in a toliet at once? idk the bathtub is much more convienient

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When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

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I was just entering the toilet in a transport cafe just as a lorry driver was coming out. "I wouldn't go in there mate if I was you" he said "Why does it smell?" I enquired "No I've just murdered a prostitute"

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What would happen if nyan cats crashed with eachother? It would be a great impact, and we'd all be sad.

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Ask me if I'm a dinosaur. Are you dinosaur? No.

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ur left leg is cristmas nd ur right leg is thanks giving can i vist

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What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

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a boy put a blanket oveer his head one night... He was warm for the rest of the night

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Mr. Wonder, optimism is seeing the glass as half full, pessimism as seeing the glass half empty, and realism as not seeing the glass at all.

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a woman gives birth at the hospital in china and then the doctor comes in and says doctor- i have good news and bad news for your baby mother-what is it doctor- bad or good mother-bad doctor-the bad news is that the baby is a girl and the good news is that your baby has cancer

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What did the man say when he lost his phone? Answer: I lost my phone!!

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Terry was always struggling with mathematics. On his last report card he received a D- in math. His parents were naturally very upset with him because they knew their son could do much better and so did Terry. Terry wanted to make his parents proud so he buckled down and started studying on a regular basis. Terry realized his had work had payed off when his 3rd grade teacher handed him his report card. Terry had revived an A in math! On his walk home from school all he could think about was how proud his mom and dad were going to be. On that walk home Terry was savagely torn apart by an escaped lion from the local zoo. His head was never found.

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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new year new me my nigga's chilling on the couch . he'l be happy if i put my dlck inside his mouth next one: i got 4 but i give it to mr. gore when he say whats your name? me:hey my mane is Erick bryan and my puss* is wet wait nonono :D

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Why did the black man run from the officer? The officer was trying to perform non-voluntary sexual acts against him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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