Did the owl ever reach the middle of the tootsie pop? Yes. Dreams do come true

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What is worst than your girlfriend's mother?? Osama Bin Laden's One

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slaughter the mussies #EDL

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why are you worrying about the chicken? You just got shot.

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Q: Do these jeans make me look fat? A: No your fat makes you look fat.

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A duck walks into a bar. The large African American male at table three punches the smaller Asian man at the bar because of a long standing and unfulfilled monetary debt. The Asian man procedes to pull out a concealed knife and repeatedly stab his assailant until he is dead. The duck orders several rounds of whiskey due to the fact that it has recently been fired from its job. Later that night, it took its own life.

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What did the Orange say to the Apple? Nothing. Both of them are lifeless objects, thus lacking the ability to speak.

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What did the elephant say to the other elephant? We're both elephants!

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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what do you call white people running down a mountain? Avalanche What do you call black people running down a mountain? Jailbreak

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Guys, I think I'm gonna apply to join the Crips. My SAT score is a 2050, and their average score is a 2200. My GPA, however, is a 4.6, and their average is only a 4.2. Do you guys think that they will take me? Or should I try and apply for the Bloods?

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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I was gonna smack jakes titties...but michael was already doing it....:/

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Statues: Show what great people look like, if birds shit all over them.

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What did the dwarf do after he sore a mole? Nothing. dwarfs are mythological creatures and therefore do not exist.

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Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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What Did The Hobo Get For Christmas? A Welcome Home Mat.

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Your mam is so fat.

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I worship you Nero, and I wont even begin to explain myself why.

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I love you! Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Squirrels are rabbid Yes mi this is a haiku!!!! I know ur reading this so grape grape grape

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Q:What do you call a sheep with no legs? A: A cloud.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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why are marcos hands all swetty. he just got done giving a hand job to joe.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Jokes about the Holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops