Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

What's worst than the Holocaust? No Wi-Fi

What do you do when life throws lemons at you? Take out your lemon shield and retreat deep into your lemon proof bunker.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others just don't

A woman walked out of the kitchen.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

how do demolish a building alkekwhakbar

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo

What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

Why did the fat guy ride his camel to the grocery store? Because he didn't want to walk to the grocery store

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a sociopathic murderer.

Why did the baby boy start crying? He got hit with a toaster

Roses are red pineapple is yellow I'll shove your head up my ass so you can eat some marshmallows!

your mom's stupid face is a dumb butthead. I hate you.

What's the color of a healthy kidney. I have no f***ing idea.

What's yellow and shark infested? Shark infested banana pudding.

Your Mommas so scary slender is afraid of her -_-

Q: Why does the chicken cross the road? A: To get hit by a redneck.

i think quinn is gay? you probably don't know him but when i walked him on him shoveling a ken doll is his butt

Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she had leprosy and had to have her legs and arms amputated

a man walks into a bar and it hurts

Did you hear about the man who lost his whole left side of his body? He has been taken to hospital and is in a critical state where his right side of his body can not be joined together. This is life threatning and he is now not able to walk

Imagine a scenario Add a Rhubarb Crumble into your scenario Add your mother and father sitting together watching the news in your scenario. Your scenario should take place in an old people's home Add an Olympic athlete doing the splits into your scenario If there were any crane-flies in your scenario, be sure to subtract them at once. Divide your scenario by two. Your scenario should now be a mental image of flying horses and a hippopotamus eating a large salmon mousse. There will be a pig tied to a pair of sunglasses.

Bob and Joe are talking about how their grandfathers died in the Hulacaust. Bob says "Mine died in the gas chambers" Joe says "Mine got drunk and fell off the guard tower.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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