Why was Six afraid of Seven. Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A cow and a whale are swimming in the sea when they both realize this is Vietnam and they were really chimps

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's blue, wriggles around, and sits in a corner? A dying baby in a plastic bag. What's green, doesn't wriggle around, and sits in a corner? A Christmas tree. The current homeowners were never made aware of the atrocity committed by the previous occupants.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you get when you cross a dog and a slice of tomato A really bad joke

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did billy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a man holding a shotgun was chasing him

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why is this joke an anti joke? Because it's not trying to be funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's worse than the holocost? 6 Million Jews

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Who is the greatest cook ever? Adolof Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's worse than getting stabbed? Getting stabbed twice. What's worse than getting stabbed twice? Getting stabbed three times. What's worse than gettin..... Why does it matter?!?!?! U should be dead by then!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the jew kill himself? Because he had no foreskin.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

theres a mexican, an asian, and an american in a plane, they're about to crash, so they all have to throw out something they have a lot of in their country. The Mexican throws out beans, and says "I have to many of these in my country." The Asian throws out rice and says "i have to many of these in my country." The American throws out the Mexican and says "I have to many of these in my country."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: What do is it called when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A: Why give it a name when it is never goin to happen!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why didn't Tyron run from the police? He had no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Want to hear something funny? Sure, what? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +10

knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the Muslim do when he got on the bus? He realized he was in the wrong place and got on a plane and blew it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q.How many dinosaur species can jump as high as a house? A.All of them, houses can't jump

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's green and has wheels? A green car.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats the difference of a pile of dead babys and a lambrogini? One of them is not inside of my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you do to stop a baby who is circling? You nail his other feet.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How does Cee Lo Green order extra ketchup? Can I have some more ketchup, please?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops