Every day thousands of pets and animals are beaten, neglected and abused.

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How's the weather? Good.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Why didn't Sally get back up? She had no legs Guess who's getting prosthetic legs for Christmas! Not Sally.

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what did the cow say to shabab?....... want some milk

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What do you call a black man walking home in the dark after a long day at work? His name you racist

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a duck walks onto a basketball court during a game. The referee sees the bird and blows his whistle crying fowl just as the player was running up to dunk. The confused bird flies away and the referee gets punched by the angry player.

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Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

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The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

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Where's the soap?

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this is not a joke.

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What's green and has wheels? A green car.

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Why did the homeless man not get any ice cream from the store? Because he was not very bright and didn't try in school. Therefore he couldn't find a job or get his job back at the janitor at Go-Mart. This proves that not doing your school work correct can really effect your future. Plus they was sold out of chocolate.

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Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup.

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Knock Knock Who's there The military. We're under attack. The military we're under attack who? Dinos

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How does Cee Lo Green order extra ketchup? Can I have some more ketchup, please?

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I like it, I like it becuase it is cream

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What did the Muslim do when he got on the bus? He realized he was in the wrong place and got on a plane and blew it up.

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Whats the difference of a pile of dead babys and a lambrogini? One of them is not inside of my garage.

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What do you call Mexicans who go to jail? Criminals.

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Doctor, everybody despises me. That cant be totally true you despicable piece of shite!

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Q.How many dinosaur species can jump as high as a house? A.All of them, houses can't jump

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How do you do to stop a baby who is circling? You nail his other feet.

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Yo mama so old, she might die soon

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Why can't jokes spit?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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