Two trains, on the same track, left different stations, and travelled in opposite directions. 74 people died.

How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

A black man walked into a bar. He cashed in big on workers comp.

what gets louder as it gets smaller? a baby in a trash compacter.

A Jew and a Muslim are playing golf. Just not together.

What has 4 legs in the morning, 2 legs at noon, and 3 legs in the afternoon? A dog that got its hind legs chopped off, and then only got 1 prosthetic one.

Q-how many dead babies does it take to paint your geradge door? A-one if you throw it hard enough

what's worse than me fucking your mom she enjoyed it

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was already in the oven.

Q: How to fit 10 babies in a suitcase? A: By blender Q: How to get the babies out of the suitcase? A: Using a straw.

Do you like fishsticks? Yes I personally think they are high in saturated fats, but to each his own Oh I thought you were asking if I was homosexual

Why did the baby stop crying? It had been smothered to death by it's sleep- deprived single mother.

A gay man walks into McDonald's. McDonald's serves people of all sexualities.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Three guys walk into a bar.....The fourth one ducks...

Why didn't the Hawaiian man know how to surf? He lives in Kansas

what did johnny's mom do for his 50th birthday? she died

this is just a tribute to the greatest anti-joke ever told as I can't quite remember how it went, but you gotta beleive me, you just had to be there, it's a matter of opinion.

What's worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? Recognizing the baby as your missing child, and finding the corpse of your dead wife next to it.

Where would you be unlikely to find a polar bear? In a courtroom.

9 Cats on a boat. One Jumped off, how many left? 8.

A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

An American, an Irish man, a Chinese man and a Black man walk in to a Bar, the Bartender takes their order

ring ring,Who is? you'r face.you'r face how?you'r but hole face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...