So, two people park their car and walk into a bar. Wait, no. They were walking into a grocery store and they were riding skateboards, not a car. Then, the kid walks in after them. Oh, did I forget to mention they had children? And also, they're married. So anyway, they walk into this grocery store, and meet a barkeep. Wait no that's ridiculous why would a barkeep be in a grocery store. Let me start over. Bah.. never mind. I forgot what happened next, but it was REALLY FUNNY!

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Well, he was dangerously fatigued from having weeped passionately the entire night in the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of 20 years and consequently finding out that his only daughter was in a tragic school bus accident.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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Q: Why do Indians smell? A: Cause they have noses? Racist.

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Two Jews walk into a concentration camp. One goes to work and the other one gets gassed.

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I'm currently on a seafood diet That is, I only eat seafood.

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Your blood is red. Your bruises are blue. I have a gun. Now drag your carcass away from my residence.

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what do you call a Nice Nazi A Nazi... He's still a Nazi.

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the sky is green no it is not

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Why did the dog get arrested? He didn't the people responsible for causing the dog fight got arrested for animal abuse.

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Banana Hamock.

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why was the black guy smelly? because his white friend threw him in a dumpster

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Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

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Holocaust jokes aren't funny

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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the man walked into the bar and said ur gay

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How did the man with no legs get around? He was assisted by a nurse or relative who was kind enough to take on such a task.

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Whats worse biting into an apple and finding a worm? -bidoof

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What do gay kittens eat? Cat food. Friskies and Fancy Feast are both popular brands.

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Jason's Wife said to him I love you before I left to head to work, Jason then went back inside to see no one was there and he remembered his wife died in 2009.

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Why is Andrew sleeping? Because he took and overdose on sleeping pills, he probably died in his sleep.

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Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

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"Sh*t!" cursed the man. "You're such a potty mouth!" replied the unamused toilet.

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How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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