Why did the boy cry? His Parents died.

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What did the hooker get for Christmas ? AIDS.

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Why are trees green? I have no idea

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A black man walks into a store with a gun. He is a policeman bringing in a murder weapon as part of his investigation.

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why did it take the black man 1.5 hours to get out of a movie theater? he wanted to patiently wait for the movie to end.

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What did the man say to the other man? I would have no clue because I am deaf

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A police officer asks a witness of a murder what he witnessed. The man replies "A murder"

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What is a haiku? Are they hard to come up with? Obviously not.

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what did the ox say to his son when he left for collage? bison

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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One day a mexican guy came up with a great anti-joke about jewish guys. Upon sharing it with a canadian buddy of his, he collapsed and died from a cerebral hemorrhage where he was then hit by a bus and mauled to bits by a pack of saber-tooth tigers.

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Why are Asian people bad drivers? Coincidental cases of blurred vision.

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Knock knock whos there Ewan Gudgeon *Shoots Himself cause cannot live with hearing tht name*

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Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

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What do you call a fucking idiotic douchebag with ebola? An ebloa paitent

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I'm going as the joker for halloween

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What do you call a billionaire who lost a large portion of their net worth? A millionaire.

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What's the difference between a leopard and a coffee table? There is no difference. They both have four legs.

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No.

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What did one stool say to the other stool? Stools don't speak!

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How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt, its just a myth

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Why was the fat girl a virgin? Good morals

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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