What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your physician, you're going to die.

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How do you kill a turtle? You can't, it has a shell for a reason.

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What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

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When Geese fly in their 'V' formation, why is one line bigger than the other? There's more geese in that line.

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Knock Knock .....................Oh it was just the TV

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Three old ladies were sitting on a bench. A man walks up and flashes them. The first old lady had a stroke. The second old lady had a stroke. The third old lady called 911 out of concern for her two friends.

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I would have buttered my bread, but the pool was cold.

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Why did the baby bird have no friends? Because he chose not to socialize with the baby birds.

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Why do canadians have a lower violent crime rate than the U.S? Because they were all raped as children and are now afraid of getting raped again when bathing in prision.

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Why did the man start vacuuming his neighbor's floor? He had to get the GSR

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Roses are red Violets are blue Dandelions are weeds

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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Me: How can you tell if somebody's a Nazi? Friend: How? Me: Their killing people in a ghetto. Friend: My friend was shot in a ghetto. Me: So, does that make him a Jew? Friend: No, he was just killed in a big ass oven.

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Think of a number between 0 and 2 That's how many times you're going to die in this life

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What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

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What do you call two black men screaming as loud as they can? Scared

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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Did you hear about my new Muslim friend? Hes the bomb!

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your mamma so fat... she went to hell.

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A casual web surfer logs onto a website and reads half a joke.

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I LOVE MASTURBAITING ALL DAY!!!!

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What is Wonder Woman's drug of choice? Heroine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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