How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool.

why is the sky blue? - because you have herpes.

Who gives a shit? Justin Beiber.

Why couldn't the man open his car door for the women? He drove a jeep with removable doors

Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had leukemia

How do you kill off a zombie apocalypse? Laser vision

Why did the two children go sledding? Because they liked to sled.

What did Pablo experience during his first day in private school? the atmosphere of a private school

What does it mean when you have big shoes? Either you were genetically born with big feet, or you are wearing sheos that are too big for you.

why is 6 afraid of 7 7 is a registered sex offender

Selena Gomez, Victoria Justice, and Arianna Grande walk into a bar. They were making a movie.

A jewish man walks into a bar and then gets hit in the testicles. he now has testicular cancer.

What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z i left out p.

If at first you don’t succeed, you clearly weren’t the right person for the job. We’re sorry, but we’re going to have to let you go; please collect your belongings and vacate the premises immediately.

Why doesnt a chicken wear pants? Because its pecker is on his head.

do you listen to dubstep? OH YEA I LOVE SKRILLEX -_-

What's an Anti Joke?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock, Knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

How did the jew win a marathon? Through hard vigorous training by running everyday and eating healthy.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

If Jonny has 300 pies and eats 299 pies what is left for Jonny? DIABETES

How did the man die? A gorilla raped him

What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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