Who has two thumbs and is happy? This girl! You're a girl?

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I dont know so why are you asking?

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hi

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Steve Jobs Died today. So did 56 million other people.

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why is 6 scared of 7 because 7 is scary...

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How did the soup lose his job? He got fired.

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Why was the boy sad? His cookies are gone.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had AIDS

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Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on.

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A boy orders a sandwich at a restaurant. He then questions the cashier about it. Boy: Excuse me, Why is my sandwich so bad? Cashier: Sorry, none of our women cooks were in today.

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What did the black guy say to you when you took his fried chicken Give me back my chicken

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What did one elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. Elephants don't talk.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did the woman put super glue on her sun glasses? Because she stepped on them and they broke.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We can never be truly sure of the chicken's real purpose, but given the circumstances of the surroundings, the story has it that the purpose of the chicken was to physically move to the other side of said road.

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EVERYONE NEEDS TO UNDERSTAND!! DYSLEXICS ARE TEOPLE POO!

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A woman is carried out of a bar.

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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How do you save Africa. Put a rash of bacon in and envelope.

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What do a purple grape and an elephant have in common? They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being taken to the slaughter house

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Whats worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings Whats worse than 2 bee stings? A car crash Whats worse than a car crash? 3 bee stings

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops