A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand, "Hey! Got any grapes?" The man then realized he was hallucinating because ducks are unable to speak proper english.

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Slam! Slam! Slam! I'm a woodpecker. Slam! Slam! Slam! Except with dirt.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are simple-minded creatures and perhaps there was some source of food on the other side.

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Drunk, a tweeker and a pot head are walking together when they come upon a huge wall with a large, locked gate in the middle of it. The drunk shouts "lesh shmash it down!" then passes out. The tweeker says "Dude, we should totally take the lock apart and see if there's some kind of mechanism in there holding it together that we can use to build some sort of machine for taking... oh man I gotta crap so bad! Either of you guys gota smoke?" and the pot head says "We should sit here and wait." I didn't say it was a good story

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: He has a debilitating disease, it's called ALS.

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TOP KEK

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A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

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How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

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Q:What's funny about a Jew marrying a Nazi? A:The situation

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What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

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Q:Why was the blond so dumb A: She had downsidrome

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What did one pig say to the other pig while sitting in the bathtub? No thanks I already have a typewriter.

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I am very humble.

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What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

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their is a box of mystery. wat is in that box?? do u no wat is in that box!?!?!?!?!?!?

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple You thought I was going to steal an anti-joke didnt you squidward

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Q. Why is the road black? A. One hundred million dollars!

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What's blue and looks just like water? Water.

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I have a gay camel

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A man was standing out in the rain and calls out to god saying "smite me god, SMITE ME NOW" and the man was arrested and booked cause a near by neighbor reported on the disturbance. he is now facing charges of disturbing the peace.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle

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what do you call two mexicans playing basketball? juan on juan

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what did the paraplegic man get for Christmas? a unicycle

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"Smithers, I'm home!" "What, already?" "Yes."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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