What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

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how can u tell if you have cancer if the doctor says so

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Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why did Bob stop at the light? Because it was red and not doing so would be illegal.

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Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

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Two guys went to a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure" said the guys. The bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? (when you are done start reading from the top again, and don't stop ever)

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What do you call a monkey holding a hand grenade? It depends on what its name is.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

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Roses are blu Violets are red Im colored blind

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Why was the Pizza Delivery boy crying? He was sad.

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What did the man say when his wife said hello? Hello.

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So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

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What's worse than a baby in a trash can The holocaust

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An Irish man walks out of a bar..... 'nuff said

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What do you call a concentration camp with a mental disability? Auschwistic.

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What did George Washington say before he crossed the Delaware? "Get in the boat."

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Why did Valter fall of the swing? Because he didn't have any arms Knock knock Whos there? Not valter

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither Has He.

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What did the finger say to the thumb? I'm in glove with you.

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what do you call a Nice Nazi A Nazi... He's still a Nazi.

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What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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