Why was the black man smoking marijuana with his friends? He was at a glaucoma support group meeting.

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Xzibit

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Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because Martin Handford drew him that way to make him unique and distinguishablefrom the hundreds of other drawn people (and animals) in the pages of the children's game book, which incidentally is known as Where's Wally in numerous non-USA countries.

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What does a camel wear at war? Camelflage

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How many dead babies can you fit in my truck? Thirty-seven and a half;)

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What did the man do to the begging orphan on a cold Christmas morning? He kicked him.

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What's brown and red but looks purple? Mixed paint!

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Q: How many Jews can you fit in a 4-seater car? A: 4

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He had nobody to go with :)

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I know you are but what am I? Gay.

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Why are you so gay? Because I am unequivocally attracted to the same sex.

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Why can't antelopes fly? Because they can't

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like. The man says,"I'm feeling light today so I'll just have some H2O." The man's friend says,"I'm feeling the same. I'll have some H2O, too." The second man died.

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Your Mom

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How can you tell two twin sisters apart? Look at one twin, then look at the other, and acknowledge that they are two different people.

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

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Roses are red , Violets Are Blue , i Dont Like rhyming , TITTIES !!

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Roses are rainbow. Violets are rainbow. Everything is rainbow. Thats why you don't take LSD.

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what do you call an exited rectangle? an Erectangle

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Yo Mama's so fat when she fell out of the tree she hit the ground very, very hard.

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Little Billy rested his head on the pile of bricks. It had been a hard day for Little Billy, but, in less than an hour, he would finally see his worm again.

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So 2 black guys walk into a bar and the bartender looks around and say "what will you fine gentlemen have?" and they order and payed their tab and could not have been more courteous, amirite?

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How do you convince a therapist that he is crazy? Hide in a fortress made of sporks wearing nothing but a belt, and start hissing and throwing paint at him repeatedly.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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