What do Wal-Mart and Michael Jackson have in common? They both have made a lot of money and are also well known around the world.

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Ron Paul for President!

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar everyone is amazed because the surgery he just got cured his parilization

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Why did the stop sign run a red light? Because it couldn't see its face...

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Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

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Which side of an ostrich has the most feathers? Obviously the outside! Who would be so low educated to even have the idea that an ostrich can have feathers on the inside of it's body?

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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if i get 1,000 likes ill kill your hole family

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What the difference between some stoned and someone drunk? When your drunk you think having a good time even when you not and when you stoned your so high you think your a dragon ball z character.

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60+8.99999999=68.99999999 soo close

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A dog was driving his car down the road right? Wrong dogs can't drive cars

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roses are red violets are blue most poems rhyme but this one doesnt

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What did the previously pregnant teen flush down the toilet? Her beloved pet goldfish who recently died. She had already given birth to a healthy baby the previous year.

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Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because six is a numerophobe.

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I feel like making a good joke.But i cant. YN

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A man walks into a bar wearing large and baggy pants. The bartender asks him, "Why the large, baggy pants?" The man replies, "Because they're comfortable."

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Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory because she kept throwing away the w's

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When's the worst time to use skin moisturizer? When you're a burn victim.

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What do Elephants never forget? 9/11

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long mane?"

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Why did Hitler try to take over the world? Hitler wanted to spread the Nazi (National Socialism) idea, He also wanted to destroy the Jews(Christian and non-Christian) and many other groups of people using the prevailing scientific idea of the day eugenics and survival of the fittest

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, these two statement are obvious unless you are color blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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