Two men were patients at a mental institution. One was named Dave, the other named John. Dave very quietly said, "Hello, my name is Dave, and I have a violent form of phonophobia, so please do not-" "DICK!" Dave promptly strangled John. John had Tourettes Syndrome.

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A fat cat sits on the ground staring up at a fence. The fence stares down at the cat and laughs.

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Knock knock Who's there? Cow Cow who? If you really think about it, it's really now

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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women's rights

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It was a beautiful day, John was driving in his car down the street, Kameron was riding his bike preparing for a bike race the following day, and Griffin was having his 7th birthday party. John ran over Kameron and Griffin, he killed Griffin and broke Kameron's legs to where he could never stand/ride again

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can A hundred dead babies in a trash can Whats worse than a hundred dead babies in a trash can A live one at the bottom Whats worse than that It eats it way out Whats worse than that It brings friends

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what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

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A piece of shit gets flushed down the toilet. The end.

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A.do i have alzheimer's? B.yes A.do i have alzheimer's?

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A chinchilla and an octopus walk into a bar. What do they say? The octopus says Hello but the chinchilla says nothing because chinchillas cannot talk.

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why did Sallt fall off the swings? she had no arms knock knock who's there not Sally

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What do an eagle and a off-white light bulb have in common? Nothing.

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guess what what that wasnt it

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oh no, i've lost my tractor

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why did the chicken cross the road? I don't care! What are you doing in my house?

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What do you call a green land with wheels? Grass lied about the wheels.

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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how did the homeless man die? He got stabbed

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a loaf of bread.

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kcuf read it backwards

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The man was allergic to water. He unfortunately died because water is needed to sustain health as a human.

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Artists have unique minds and can rotate shapes within their mind. I'm going to masterbate.

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oh no a butt!!!!!!!!!! your stubid oh wait your right ahhhhhhhhhh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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