Knock Knock. Who's there? grape. Grape who? Purple grape.

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Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

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When life throws lemons at you, just give up and commit suicide!

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What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

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What is the difference between Madeleine McCan and a toaster? A toaster wasn't raped and murdered.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? It's hard to say, as this number depends on a large number of factors including the average area covered by one lick, the pH of saliva, the solubility of Tootsie Pops, the temperature of both the saliva and the Tootsie Pop, and the amount of saliva deposited on the Tootsie Pop after each lick. This is not to mention all the manufacturing irregularities that may occur during production, and varying tongue shapes and solvency properties of saliva.

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What is worse than getting a bad grade on a test. Having your family dog bled out in front of you, bitch.

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kill yourself....with a cigarette

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What happens if you Put a Mental Patient in a cage He goes crazy, Develops schizophrenia and Eventually dies of Many Incurable Diseases

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How did the young boy cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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When time is the best time to make a wish during the day? 9:11

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"...."-Hellen Keller

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A Man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The Bartender proceeds to unload a 30 round banana clip into his head, neck, and midsection.

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Why did the little girlbnot wake up? Because her mother smothered her in her sleep.

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What did the waitress do when the man asked for pizza? She ran away

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Anti-jokes

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Blonde: what does IDK stand for? Brunett: i don't know Blonde: NOBODY KNOWS!!!

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What Do you say to an atheist after he sneezes? Bless you. Its just polite

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Two planes walk into an office building

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What do you call a Muslim guy on a plane? A passenger.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Some home health supplies. He really needed them, too.

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Why did the man eat his wife? He was a cannibal

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whats purple, extinct, and smells like children? barney

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops