Knock knock? Whose There? Not Suzie, She can't knock

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How many napkins does it take to tack to the moon? Purple, snakes don't have elbows

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper doesn't respond because he is a grasshopper and therefore can't talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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A duck walks into a bar "Can I have some brandy, please" says the duck The bartender then proceeds to make millions because he was the first to discover a talking duck

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A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.

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why are the Harold and Kumar movies really funny? the man who wrote obvieusly has a good sense of humor.

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MR MR WHO?? MR MC CANN

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Touche.try eating something, I eat low carb crap when I am too sleepy, and today I guess it works.

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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A blond and a brunette are on the moon. The brunette says to the blond "I'm glad that independent company's are taking the job of American space travel."

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"knock knock" "whos there" "poop" "poop who" "poop in the toilet"

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Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar everyone is amazed because the surgery he just got cured his parilization

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What do a boat and a computer have in common? Nothing

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What does a man say to his annoying friend? Please stop annoying me now.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Magic.

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Dogs

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Extra extra read all about it dunkin donuts has now been named dunkin pigs..a cops favorite hang out.

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What did the father say to his son? I'm leaving and I'm not actually your father.

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Simon says.. Nothing because he is deaf, so therefor he would have to sign it to you.

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How do you drown a dumb blonde? Hold her underwater.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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