I treat women like I treat dead bodies. With respect.

Obama walks into a hospital....

There is a famous joke, "What's black and white and re(a)d all over? A newspaper!" However, this is not featured on this website. Why? Because this is anti-joke.com, not joke.com - you moron

If you are swimming in a tree how many dogs does it take to crack a duck? The answer is 4 because nothing rhymes with orange

whats worse than a pile of dead babies? two piles of dead babies.

What happens when you cross a Labrador and a Poodle. A species of dog that has been cross bred.

What's worse than Jedward? Nothing. They are really and truly awful.

why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know but some black man is starting up his deep-frier on the other side

What is the difference between a white man and black man who are facing each other? They have different rights.

Q: What did the passengers think of thier Chineese bus driver? A: They were very pleased with the bus driver's service, for he was a very safe driver and got them to their destination on time.

What does a casino have in common with a woman liqur in the front, and poker in the back

why cant dogs write letters? They do not have the dexterity to hold a pen, or even comprehend the basic language skills and grammatical layout of how to write a letter

You've been in robotics too long if you start talking to your tools. You've been in there way too long if they start talking back!

Do you love me? No.

Are you from Tennessee? Because you look like a product of incest

Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

Where did Jonathon go after he died? - Burger King, he died from diabetes

Whats the differance between a blond and a rock? I don't know. I can't think of any.

What's worse than the common cold? The Plague.

Why was Ethan talking to the potato? Because he is stupid.

I went to the doctor & he gave only 6 months to live. I told him I couldn't pay my bill, he said "that doesn't change the fact you're going to die soon."

Q: Why did Katie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.. Q: Why didn't she have any arms? A: 50. Cal... Q: Wait where'd she go? A: I don't know there's a helicopter in my scop- wait what the f**k is going on?.... TO: CoD 4 Players -Ap

Why isn't Abraham Lincoln on Mount Rushmore? Because he doesn't have a helicopter and he's dead.

what do you call a monkey? a monkey

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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