Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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why did the little boy die? He had AIDS

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You know what would be funny? If the Incredible Hulk asked Spiderman to change his diaper.

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What is the difference between ashes and a jew? A lot

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'll choke you with a hose

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had finished her breakfast and had to get to her job as a firefighter.

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Why should you never eat a jellyfish on a Wednesday? Because it will sting you with its poison.

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(you will only get this if you play minecraft) whats green and looks like a penis? a creeper!

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Why didn't Hitler like steak? He was a vegetarian.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? - Because she had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up again? - Because she had no legs. Why didn't anyone help her? - Because she had no friends. Knock knock. -Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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Where did Adolf go as a vacation after the war? Hell

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Why could the penguin not fly? It was shot in the wing.

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Q: what r u eating under there? A: underwear ewww thats nasty

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Turn your Caps Lock off, people think you're yelling at them, Stephen Hawking.

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How do you stop birds from building nests in your grill? You turn the grill on

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Three Kids dressed as a bear, a chicken, and a penguin walk into a bar. The bartender asks the to leave as they are all under the legal drinking age.

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? A: Because she was dead.

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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what did the blind orphan with no legs get for christmas? cancer.

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What do you get when you cross bread an eagle, a wolf and shark together? I don't know, but I'm pretty sure it will kill all of us!

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Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

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Kefka > Sephiroth

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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