why did the man throw a stone in the lake? because he'd had a long day at work.

why was joe in hospital with facial disorder? his mum hit him with a fridge

A black man and two Mexican men are all in the same car, who's driving? One of the Mexicans.

How do you make a plumer cry? Kill his family

Andrew's a bald wankstain.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

Q. Which is longer ... a rope ?

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! In for a penny, in for a pound. I'm Donald Trump!

How do you scare off a ghost? Tell him your ready for a commitment.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are polemicists.

a Dyslexic, Agnostic, Insomniac stayed up all night, wondering if there really was a dog.

What's worse than finding a dead fly in your soup? Finding your soup in a dead fly

What did the boy with a crippled arm get for his birthday? A guitar.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven beat and raped Six when he was child multiple times, and Seven threatened to kill Six if he told anyone.

Why didn't the man buy the sportscar? He couldn't drive stick

Two lifelong friends walk into the locl Bar and each order a Beer. " So how's life treating ya?" Phil replies, " Well Doug, I've got Stage Four Lung Cancer. I'm going to Die, remember?" Unfortunately, Doug doesn't remember because Doug has a Brain Tumor.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid being killed in the slaughter house.

What was the pirates favorite letter? Q.

Why was the woman happy to give birth to a beautiful, healthy child? Just kidding, she had an abortion.

AIDS

What's the opposite of white? Black. You're racist. You fapped.

sdfrgtyuki

I was gonna smack jakes titties...but michael was already doing it....:/

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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